Things You Should Know About: Late, Late Tuesday Edition

Why this picture? Why not this picture? Who doesn't need more sexy, dramatically lit abs in their life?

In the course of avoiding sleeping on my giant bruise, I managed to utterly fuck up my entire back and neck so that I can’t particularly turn my head or raise my right arm, so I spent today in a pain-muddled frenzy of trying to get Important Things Done, like shipping my artwork to Seattle for the Seattle Erotic Art Festival, complaining about not being able to do burpees as assigned by le derby coach and feeding myself. OK, so: today’s blog post, in the pursuit of my Once A Day For The Month Of May (do you believe that I realized that phrase rhymes only after I typed it, and then had to go back and capitalize it?) is better late than never, right?

Upcoming Things You Should Know About That Are Especially Useful If You Live In The Bay Area or Seattle, or EVERYTHING IS HAPPENING IN THE NEXT WEEK, holy fuck:

Thursday, May 12th: Femina PotensFist Full of Film.

The official description says:

May 12th – 8pm – 1am – Fist Full of Film, featuring the Erotic Feature Film, Indietro, directed by Viviane Darkbloom & presented by Kink Studios, starring Lila Cat, Auora Snow, Ned Mayhem and Madison Young.  Q&A w/ the director and performers along with installations of black and white porn loops, burlesque performances by some of the Bay Area’s sexiest burlesque performers, Chica Boom.

You can get tickets in advance here or purchase them at the door (which might be complicated if you don’t know where Mission Control is — sign up for a free membership to get directions, or just get tickets beforehand). And check out the trailer — wow.

I’m not entirely sure, but I think I actually had a rather long discussion with the director of this movie when we were on the set of the orgy I helped organize on the Upper Floor for Kink’s Open Invitation: A Real Swinger’s Orgy in San Francisco (how’s that for a mouthful of a title?). The film was still in pre-production at that point, and she was getting a feel for the kinds of things that worked and that didn’t work while on set. She was also really nice about letting me tag along with her all night, as I spent most of the evening being somewhat unsettled by the advances of my ex-bosses wife. So! I am stoked that this film actually got made and looks really beautifully shot, and will probably be volunteering during the event.

Saturday, May 14th:’s 100th Episode with Jiz Lee and Nina Hartley

Oh my goodness. See pictures above for hotness and/or adorableness (Nina’s picture on the Crashpad site is titled “Leopard Guffaw”, which is perfect).

Jiz sums it up more eloquently:

For me, Nina represents the classic boundary pushing lesbian who broke the barriers in the early days of queer women in porn (ie: “San Francisco Lesbians” on VHS). Flash forward, and we have Shine Louise Houston working in digital glory on, a queer site that continues to push the envelope for representation of queers of diverse sexualities, genders, backgrounds, sizes, abilities… basically, the sex we’re really having. So there’s a lot of celebration with introducing Nina on the site. And I am the one who gets to bring her!

The official page can be found on the Crashpad Series site. I agree wholeheartedly (I mistyped ‘wholehartedly’, heh) with Jiz: I want to see the Crashpad Series continue well into its 1000th episode, and if you want that to happen, go go go and watch the celebration.

Friday, May 20th: Isabel Allende at Bookpassage

One of my favorite authors — my copies of Eva Luna and House of the Spirits are dog eared and well read beyond belief — and by many accounts an amazing speaker, Allende will be speaking at a local bookstore about her newly released (and seemingly fascinating) book Island Beneath the Sea.

From Bookpassage: “Isabel Allende talks about her novel Island Beneath the Sea. Allende is the author of many internationally acclaimed books, including House of the Spirits, Portrait in Sepia, Daughter of Fortune, My Invented Country, and Paula.”

Sadly the talk is not free, but it does include a signed copy of the book (no word on whether it’s a paperback or a hardcover) and a catered lunch. If you can’t make it to the talk, a bunch of her interviews are available on YouTube, including this one, where Allende talks about passion, from TED.

Saturday, May 21st: The Golden Apocalypse
The renowned Bay Area Derby Girls All-Stars face off the beast that is the Rocky Mountain Fight Club. I don’t know much about how rankings for any sport work, but the Golden Girls (the travel team of the BADGirls) was recently ranked 6th in the nation by Derby News Network, and I am suitably impressed. Rocky Mountain is ranked number one, and DNN has this to say about them:

In their first flat-track action of 2011, last year’s champs only seemed to be getting better, holding last year’s 4th place Philly to single digits in the first half on their way to a dominating 183-32 win. That extends their current flat-track win streak to 10 games, and they’ll face off against two contenders from their West region this month when they take on Rose City on the 7th and Bay Area on the 21st.

In short: this game will be fucking epic. If you want to go, you should definitely consider buying tickets beforehand – they’re cheaper, and the last game actually sold out (though it was at a different, much smaller venue last month).

Friday, May 20th to Sunday, May 22nd: Seattle Erotic Art Festival.

Ok, so I’ve told you, Internet, about this before, but you should go! You can check out the schedule — I’m particularly excited about the Anti-Art School workshops — or you can get an idea of what to do from this handy guide, which mentions “the thrilling Electro Bike,” which is now on the top of my list of things to see in person.

There are a bunch more fantastic things happening, like the 100th Bay to Breakers Race (word is nudity is go, but alcohol is not, so all bets are off for the madness & mayhem of the race), this really interesting sounding class at the Center for Sex and Culture called ‘In The Mood‘ (sorry, FetLife only link, as I can’t seem to find a description on the CFSC site; sign-up is free and totally worth it) which is discussing Playing Smart with Mental Illness and Mood Disorders (which sounds like it would be useful for everyone, not just folks interested in BDSM), the Masturbate-A-Thon at the Center for Sex and Culture as well, and probably 2012038003 more events that I would want to go to if I knew about them and won’t be able to attend because I can’t be in multiple places at once.


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